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21

Photo by Chuttersnap on Unsplash

I love to try new things. And I like goals. But I don't always like super big things (like New Year's resolutions). Quite a few years ago, though, I felt like I needed something for the year. We had moved the year before (moved in together!), and we were in a new neighborhood. So I decided that I would try one new restaurant near our new place every month. It was so much fun! I went with various friends and with my partner. We all had a good time, and my partner and I found a couple of new favorite restaurants.

Another year I wanted to get better at knitting, so I decided I would make something every month. That experiment didn't work as well. I made a few things, but the monthly goal was too much for me (I'm a slow knitter!), and it started being not so fun

In 2019 I set the goal of going to each of the reciprocal venues that had free admission with our zoo membership, and that was the best one so far! So many fun trips!

This year, I'm trying out a new recipe every month, something that's a little tricky or intimidating to me. So far I've made bao, dolmas, and homemade pizza, and this month I'm going to try egg foo yung.

I've learned that my experiments work best if they're something I can do, something that happens on one day, rather than something that stretches over the whole month. I've also learned that I enjoy them more if I share them with others. So the years where it didn't go as well, wasn't as enjoyable, when I didn't make it to the end of the year werent' failures at all. They helped me see what works for me. And that's a thing I am trying to learn about all sorts of "failures." I thought this story about how things not going as planned or hoped are still helpful might be useful to some of you out there. I hope you are finding fun experiments of your own no matter what the outcome!

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8

In a group I'm in we were talking about how "what if" can really hold us back from doing things we want to do. I joined the conversation, agreed with what we were all saying, gave encouragement. And then I was thinking about my own what ifs, and I realized something really big.

My what ifs do hold me back, but it's not only the potential bad things that could happen. I have a really huge, anxious reaction about the possible good things that might happen. Unpacked that a little more and found this big, loud voice saying that if I do have some success I won't be able to do it more than once or won't be able to sustain it. Lots of reasons about why those things are true.

So wow... is this a fear of success? Not exactly. It's a fear of not being able to be successful in an ongoing way. I have work to do, clearly, but this is really interesting, and it's very cool to have this new piece of information.

This work of growing and moving forward is ongoing, and if we stay open and pay attention we will always find new clues, yeah?

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10

Off the internet, I'm a substitute teacher (English teacher looking for a classroom). Today I got to sub in a middle school humanities class, and at the end of class the teacher gave journaling prompts and had the students write for 10 minutes. I loved the prompts so much, I decided I want to do them for a 10 minute journaling today because doing 10 minute writing is my favorite. And then I decided that I would write here and share it with you, because these prompts are really good.

  1. What's happening? What's going on?
  2. 3 things you do every day/ 3 things you want to do every day
  3. What is the difference between what you do and what you want to do?

How great are these questions?! Okay, here are my answers.

What's happening? I'm tired. My allergies are really bad right now, and coupled with getting sub jobs again and going back to work after a year off is kind of knocking me down. But I did my strength training and even a 20 minute walk today, so I'm feeling pretty proud of myself. I also went to a grocery store (not Trader Joe's which is small and so feels very different) for the first time in over a year, and it felt really weird.

Three things I do every day. I'm going to skip over the basics of teeth brushing and all that. Three things I do every single day. I'm having a hard time pinning things down. Drink coffee in the morning? That seems like one of the basics. I watch TV every day. I read every day. I play games on my phone every day. I don't know if I do anything else absolutely every day. I don't write or paint every day. I take days off from exercise. I don't cook every single day--Friday nights are carry-out night for one thing. It's interesting that I don't have any "important" things that I do every day.

Three things I want to do every day:

  • Something creative. It's really easy to let it slide when I'm tired and unfocused or busy or some combination. It wouldn't even have to be writing or painting or stitching. Just something. I notice that doing my current daily hand lettering practice doesn't feel like it fits the bill here.
  • Spend time with my lists and planners and thoughts and goals. I feel like I let them slip away from me when I don't give them regular attention, but it's been harder to do that since I started subbing after my old office closed so I don't have a stead schedule and routine anymore
  • Something spiritual. Light a candle, say a prayer, draw some cards. I used to do this so regularly, and now it's like I don't remember how, but I know I like the feeling of doing these things regularly.

What's the difference between what I do and what I want to do? Ease. The stuff I do every day is right there in front of me. It's easy to do, it's accessible. I don't have to set things up, get things out, prepare anything do do them. This tells me something I already knew about what I need to do to help me get to my goals more regularly. I do things more when they are easy to just sit down and get started on. Time to get back to that studio reorganization!

What about you? Do you have things, important things, that you do every day? Do you have to do anything to get yourself to do them? I'd love to hear about your routines!

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Do you choose a word of the year? I do. I've been doing it most years for a while now (can't quite remember how long, that's how long it's been!). I love the idea of having a guiding light for my year.

It can be hard to choose, though, and I feel a little bit like it's harder this year. I'm trying not to put too much pressure on 2021, but the feeling of needing something much better is hovering around me. So, in case you're new to choosing a word of the year or if you're also having a hard time choosing, I thought I'd share how I choose mine.

Choosing a Word of the Year

  • Decide how you want to feel throughout the year while you're taking steps to reach your goal. For example, I want to feel like I am taking steady, everyday actions and steps that incorporate my goals into my daily life.
  • Pick out some keywords that match that vibe you're aiming for. For me, I picked everyday, steadfast, persistent, consistent, regular, and practice. Pop open a thesaurus site (I love Power Thesaurus and Word Hippo) and start looking up your words. Follow some rabbit holes and click on words that stand out for your, and see if something resonates. It's fine if you have a list of words. Audition them and see what works! Or maybe even use more than one word.
  • Don't feel like you have to commit right away. Spend some time with your words. Use them as prompts to do some journal writing for two minutes or five minutes (something short, whatever feels good for you). Write the words on sticky notes or index cards and leave them where you can see them in passing throughout your days and think about them as you're going along. Notice if any of them seem to draw your attention more than the others.
  • Pick a word. There is no wrong choice. And you can always change. You could even change words every month or every season. Let yourself be flexible.

Ways to Use Your Word of the Year

  • Look at your goals for the year and do a short journal writing session for each goal, writing about how your word might interact with that goal and how taking steps toward that goal would look if you're keeping your word in mind.
  • Write your word at the top of your weekly planner spread (if you use a weekly planner, of course--you can also do this for a monthly or daily planner). This will remind you to approach the world with your word in mind.
  • Make an art card (ATC, index card, whatever size you like) for your word and put it somewhere you'll see it regularly.

I hope this helps you decide on a word and gives you some ideas of how to actually use your word to help you with your goals. Drop me a note and tell me your word, and I'll tell you mine as soon as I've made a final decision.

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I've been up to all sorts of creative shenanigans lately, as you can see from the photo. I thought I'd catch you up on my world and ask about what you've been making and inspired by lately.

So, in no particular order, lately I've been:

  • Writing (and winning!) NaNoWriMo
  • Gel printing, painting, and gluing Christmas stockings and mini trees for holiday cards
  • Making a tiny little journal (it's just over 3x5!) for Kasia Avery's Advent Calendar art journal workshop
  • Stitching a bunch of tiny beaded embroidery kits on perforated paper
  • Deciding between learning stumpwork embroidery or goldwork in 2021

I'm also planning out a new-recipe-a-month experiment for 2021. There will be pictures of food next year! And of course I'm finishing up the lessons for New Year's Ease. There's still time to join me for that, so jump on in!

What about you? What have you been creating or inspired by? Any plans for new projects? Drop me a note in the comments--I'd love to hear about your creative life.

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It's that time of year. It feels like every business I see messages from is touting some "make your plans and have your best, most productive year ever starting in January" workshop or article or book. Everyone is pressuring for making resolutions and making plans and following through and...

This always feels like too much pressure to me. This year, it feels even worse. I do not want this. I do not want to feel like I have to have every minute of my day planned and scheduled. I do not want to feel like everything I do needs to be in service to meeting some goals.

I also don't want to have an aimless year where I get not much of anything done, and when I do accomplish something it seems mostly accidental.

I want something in between (okay, maybe leaning more toward the rambling and incidental to be honest).

I made something in between. It's called New Year's Ease*. It's a five-day workshop running from December 26 - 30. It's going to help with making plans and goals so you have something to aim for, but it's also going to help with dreaming and with finding the ways to work toward goals while having ease and relaxation and time for things you didn't even think about doing but really want to that come up during the year.

I believe that the worth of our lives is not measured in productivity and exhaustion. It's not measured in how much we've accomplished or how much money we've earned. You do not have to schedule every minute of your day, put your nose to the grindstone, be constantly on task to reach goals and be satisfied with your life and what you're doing.

I believe it is the aim of our lives to find the things that make us feel good and proud of ourselves but also like we have time and space to breathe and enjoy the world around us and the life we have. I want to work on building that kind of life. I hope you'll join me in December.

*Registration opens November 30. Price: $35

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Photo by Tatiana Rodriguez on Unsplash

We're in Week Two of NaNoWriMo, and I'm way behind. I'll probably catch up, but I might not. I might fail. And that's okay.

I'm seeing a lot of my fellow WriMos in the same boat and lamenting their possible fate and being really down on themselves, though, so I wanted to talk about failing. Don't get hung up on it. Failing is not the worst thing that can happen.

Sometimes failing can be a good thing. How?

  • Failing can show you things that don't work so you can start over and avoid them
  • Failing can show you things you never thought of so new ideas and new projects might spring up
  • Failing can show you that you are doing something, you are out there moving ahead, you are trying (and yes, there is such a thing as trying; Yoda was wrong, and you can see my thoughts on that here)
  • Failing can remind you that there are still things to learn and discover out there and rekindle your enthusiasm

Failing isn't usually fun (unless it's cake experiments--that can be a lot of fun). But it's not a terrible thing to avoid. If you never fail, you might be playing it safe, and that's probably going to keep you from getting where you want to go. So try things out, reach a little, let yourself fail, and remember it's all part of the process, not the end of things. Failing is just another step. You took that step, you fell down. Now, get up and try again.

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2

Photo by Jelleke Vanooteghem on Unsplash

Do you have a dream so big you don't even spend much time thinking about it? A dream you brush off as not a real goal or desire, just a passing fancy? Because it's so big it seems like there's no way it's happening?

I do.

I want to be a published author. I've been writing for decades, and before that I was a storyteller, making up tales in the lunch line to amuse myself and my friends. Since high school, teachers and workshop leaders and fellow writers have been telling me I'm a good writer and that I should submit some of my work. I still haven't done it. There are a lot of reasons--fear that I'll never get published even if I try; overwhelm at the idea of all the things you have to do to submit stories and keep track of where you've submitted, etc.; the constant, compelling pull of new stories and projects. But mostly I think it's been the fear that I can't do it or it won't be what I thought--all of that. I even convinced myself for a few years that I didn't want to be published, that I just wanted to write stories to enjoy them, and that was enough. It sounded good, and I even believed it.

So how do you know you have a secret from yourself? It usually surfaces frequently but in a quiet way. You make something and think "I could sell this," and then you brush it aside and move on to other things. People around you comment on how good your work it, what a talent you have, that you could sell this/show this/be a professional, and you thank them and turn your attention to other things and don't think of it again. But this kind of thing happens a lot, and you spend a little time thinking about it sometimes. You give the idea a little bit of attention, but then you have a lot of what seem like really good reasons to not do it, and you go back to not dreaming.

What do you do if you realize you've been keeping a secret dream from yourself? Maybe nothing (you weren't expecting that, were you?). Try to pay attention to when the idea crops up and how you feel about it. Spend some time just observing the idea and how you feel about it.

If you decide you want to go for it, go! But start small. (You know I love small steps!) You've probably had this dream for awhile. You don't need to make it happen right this very minute. Do one small thing toward it. Do your best not to think of the other steps that need to happen. One at a time, and give yourself as much time as you need. This is your dream, it deserves time, and you deserve to enjoy it, not stress out about it!

Here's the breakdown I've made for myself so far. Hopefully these steps will help you with your dreams, too:

  • Figure out if you have a dream you're not acknowledging or pursuing
  • Decide if you want to follow this dream
  • Look for a first small step to take (make it smaller than you think is small enough!)
  • When you've taken a small step, celebrate it
  • Choose another small step and take that one
  • Take your time and enjoy the journey!

I hope your dreams are feeling one step closer now. Drop me a note here or on social media and tell me about your dreams and your small steps, and we'll celebrate together.

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2

Photo by Social.Cut on Unsplash

I plan my own birthday celebration every year. That way, I know I'll be doing something I enjoy. I'll have fun and have good memories to look back on. Usually it involves going somewhere with my partner and a couple of my close friends. We've gone to the Oregon Coast Aquarium, on a scenic train ride at the coast, to the Oregon Garden... All sorts of fun and memorable adventures, always with a meal at someplace we haven't tried, and usually involving at least a little bit of a road trip.

This year, of course, things are a little different. I'm doing a small adventure on Saturday--just the two of us going to the Oregon Zoo then getting carry-out Bavarian food for dinner and a movie at home.

To make up for the more low key birthday celebration, I decided to have three days of celebrations. Today was getting art supplies (I actually went in a store! My favorite little embroidery shop, where they limit customers and require masks and have you use hand sanitizer, so about as safe as you can get outside your house). And there will be carry-out dinner (Hawaiian!) and a movie tonight. And tomorrow night, too. And then Saturday's adventure.

So here's what I'm feeding my Muse with for my birthday weekend:

Now I'm going to go make a swatch page with all of my fun new toys and finish the cute little cross stitch on paper kit I'm working on so I can jump into one of these new ones. I hope you're having fun and find what appeals to your Muse out there. And remember, you never have to wait for someone else to invite you to the fun. Go out and make your own adventures! Have fun!

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First tomatoes from the garden in our new house (2015).

I love working in timed bursts. Working with a timer focuses me and keeps me going. I also love knowing I have a finite amount of time until I'm finished (even if the whole project isn't finished). I think working in timed bursts is a really effective way to get things done even if, or maybe especially if, (like me) you're highly distractible and unfocused.

I first started using a timer to do creative work when I read about it in Writing Down the Bones by Natalie Goldberg. She recommends different amounts of time (or alternately writing for a certain number of pages) depending on circumstances, and this has worked amazingly well for me ever since I started doing it way back in the late 80s.

At some point, though, I heard about The Pomodoro Technique, and I was pulled in by the promise of productivity and focus. It was so simple, too. Get a timer. Pick a task. Work for 25 minutes then take a break. Every four sessions, take a longer break. I was going to do all the things!

Turns out it didn't quite work that way for me. For some tasks (okay, a lot of tasks), 25 minutes was too long for me. I couldn't hold my focus for that long. I couldn't maintain momentum for that long. Most of the time I couldn't even do one Pomodoro let alone get to that longer break after four of them.

I still liked the idea of it, though, so I experimented. I tried out different intervals. I even tried out some longer ones (every once in a while I can do a 30 minute writing sprint if I've warmed up with some shorter sprints). I tried really short ones (even two minutes--you can do a lot in two minutes!). I found that my best interval is 10 minutes with a 3-5 minute break in between (and a longer break after a few sessions).

How can you use a timer to get more stuff done? Experiment!

Things to try or to keep in mind:

  • Have a specific task in mind before you start (even if you're doing writing sprints, having at least a vague idea of what you're working on helps you focus).
  • Make sure you have everything set up (including your timer) before you start.
  • Try a variety of time intervals (including changing the length of breaks).
  • Try working with music, in silence, with ambient sounds (there are apps for that!), and in various locations to see if any of them make it easier to work.
  • Unless you absolutely hate working in a particular length of time you try, give each interval a few tries before deciding if it works for you or not.
  • Do not skip breaks! (The one exception is if you're really on a roll with a creative project and you just want to keep writing, painting, sculpting, whatever because you're in a good spot and know where you're going next. Give yourself permission to follow the Muse.)
  • Have a plan for what you'll do for your breaks. Try playing with your dog or cat, checking in on the other people in your house if you don't live alone, refilling your water bottle, checking social media (but only if you're sure you can stop after the allotted break time), anything that lets you relax a little and reset.
  • When it's your longer break, get up and do something. Get yourself a reward (cup of tea or coffee, take a dance or stretch break, do something that gets you up and away from your work spot.

That's it. Get a timer (if you have a smartphone or tablet you already have one) and see what you can do!

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